You’ve got to get up every morning with a smile on your face
And show the world all the love in your heart
Then people gonna treat you better
You’re gonna find, yes you will
That you’re beautiful as you feel. –Carole King
Back on my soapbox, this time for the ladies….I might tick off a few of you, so feel free to comment publicly or email me privately. I can take it.
Girls- when you look in the mirror, stop focusing on the little tiny thing on your body that you hate! I guess we can blame the media, the magazines that airbrush already-thin models, whatever. I’m saying: take it back. No one should have that kind of control over how you feel about yourself. You were born with a genetically pre-disposed body, so make the most of it. If you have good health, you do not need to complain that:
- your ankles or your lips are too thin
- your belly button is too deep
- your hair, your eyes, your skin, is a bad color
- your nose, toes, butt, you name it, is too big
I’m not saying that women shouldn’t take care of themselves. In fact I am saying the opposite: take care of what you were given, and you will appear beautiful to everyone. When you feel good about yourself, you give off a natural shine that is as attractive as light to a moth. I believe that if you lined up one hundred women and only one of them was smiling and happy, that would be the one people (men, women and children) would find the most attractive, even if they were all drop-dead gorgeous. If you eat well and maintain an active lifestyle, you will feel energetic and positive; that shows on your face, in your voice and in your social interactions. When you find clothes that fit you well, and complement your shape, you look wonderful!
Make-up and plastic surgery are a huge business all over the world; this is no secret. In 2010, women globally spent $35 billion on cosmetics (http://www.reportlinker.com/ci02147/Make-up.html) and here are some fascinated facts about recent surgeries: http://www.surgery.org/sites/default/files/2011-quickfacts.pdf I am not judging those who chose to surgically change their appearances. I have had this discussion with several friends who say that the nose job, lipo, botox, etc, makes them feel so much better about them selves. That’s all good as long is it doesn’t lead to feeling bad about something else that needs fixing. I’m also aware that many of us aging beauties will be dragged kicking and screaming into old age- I’m one of those. I spend my share on anti-aging face creams, I take Resveratrol religiously, and I highlight my grays (actually, my husband does it for me- those $12 kits with the caps do wonders!). But I will never forget my college roomate who took two hours to get her make-up on before she would allow anyone to see her, at the age of 18! At that time, I did not wear any make-up, and she told me to never start because I would never think I looked right without it. She was right about that- now that I wear mascara every day, I think I look tired without it. So I’m no saint in this tirade I’m on…
One of my pet peeves these days is how, when we go out, we see young women who obviously have spent hours preening and prepping for the club with men who obviously threw on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and, if we are lucky, ran a comb through their hair. There needs to be some consensus- either the women have to spend less effort or the men need to spend more. I wonder why, in the animal word, it is the male of the species with the pretty feathers, manes, songs and dances; yet in the human world, it is the women who feel they have to preen in order to get attention. Ladies, here’s a news flash: we already have what they want. Make them do a little work for it instead of the other way around.
In the end, my message is this, plain and simple: you are gorgeous. You were born gorgeous and you will be gorgeous until the day you die. When you look in the mirror, try to see yourself the way others see you. They don’t see the details the way we do- the lines and wrinkles, etc; they see the whole package. I think we should all throw out the make-up mirrors that magnetize your pores to ten times their normal size. Thank goodness no one walks around with a magnifying glass to examine our faces. So stop nitpicking and start celebrating! Some people will find you attractive and some won’t. That’s not your problem.
Here are some rather shocking looks at how the media shows beauty. If you only want to see one, watch the Dove video on the first link…